Months fly by in a jiffy. Harking back, they seem to dissociate into powdery thin bits of the past, those moments that arrived into your life with magnanimous gestures. Few of them manage to remain equally important several days from the happening, but few others fail irrevocably. Maybe it's an idea worth upholding to jot down nitbits from the past,however trivial they may seem in the big picture, so that several years down the lane you would find yourself sweeping away the dust from the attic only to confront the long forgotten gems of your life, the things that made you who you are.
October was thrilling. It offered joy so did it dampen the good spirits with a few heart aches. Isnt it necessary that one keeps miseries close to ones heart just like the goodnesses that life offers, you may ask. Life builds itself up from the pitfalls, I say. Let us consider a situation. I get scolded for a shortcoming of mine which cost someone else pain and subsequently I get punished for the same . I scream at the cruelty of fate, how it focusses on busting me rather than uplifting my days every time. I ponder over the event a day later once the bitten mind of mine has pacified and I see things in a different perspective. Was fate wrong ? Or was my judgement ? I take care never to repeat the mistake, never to let my deeds punish me a second time, pushing me over the abyss. Life is such. You learn to be right once a mishap beholds you. You learn to keep growing once success garnishes you.
October has seen it all. My smile, my tears, my surprise and my dejections. So a thought raved inside my mind as to whether I should be jotting down the same so that I would give life to my past a second time. And here I am with my memoir of the beauty this October was.
Deciphering the nugget that remains encoded in the proverb - ' Practice makes perfect'. I had dedicated an entire post for the revelation, that hit me one day over a cup of tea. I find it odd chipping in excerpts from my writings, but then this post would remain incomplete if i didn't do so. From my post 'Of Rain And Life' :-
‘Every theatre day felt like a distressing event to me in the beginning . And before long, my decision to take up a surgical field had started morphing into an irrevocable mistake to me, bogging me down. Though I could conjure up the courage to perform the surgeries in the same way as my teachers taught me, the thought of standing beside the surgery table waiting to paint and drape the patient as the anesthesiologist skillfully induced the patient, pricked my conscious being like nothing else.
But then, things changed. One surgery down. Two surgeries down. Ten surgeries down. The fears surprisingly got dampened in the strength offered by the many days of practice. And one fine day, while glowing in the joy of having had a fruitful day in hospital, an age old nugget dawned on me, making me glow brighter. ‘Practice makes perfect’.Quite truly so. A revelation hit me with an unprecedented rush then that with each attempt of a seemingly difficult duty, be it a surgery or anything else that we encounter in daily life, eventually the same poses threats of lighter intensity than it had in the start. You just need to be brave enough to believe this fact so that you would actually go out there and try without shunning the cues. And moreover, have faith in yourself.
Nonetheless, the fears continue to chase me. But I feel their presence a little less these days. Or better yet, I now feel confident enough to tackle those fears single handed, armed with the weapon that is self confidence.’
Few things are better left shrouded forever. Especially if those hurt you every time they are unveiled, intentionally or not, inside you. But then there are people who find solace in pouring their heart out to their friends. I belong to the first half – who keep sorrows tucked away hidden in the deepest corners of my mind so that not a second person finds his or her way to it to poke me a second time with its pointed head. The whole point in writing this post seems dubious at this juncture, i know. So let me, in a few words, put it this way :-
‘ Life is not a bed of roses. There are times when you are thrashed to the shore by reality while you were engulfed in the peacefulness of sailing the sea. I have a word or two for myself for those times, words that were passed down over generations in view of the priceless truth that they carried – ‘ This too shall pass’.
New Possessions :-
A brand new Lenovo Yoga 2 Tablet! When a friend first suggested it to me i was apprehensive for i have had my share of dejections when my heart went out for products that were less in demand. But two weeks from procuring this one, i must say i haven’t experienced anything like this in my whole life when it came to the technology front.
A silver ring with an emerald stone at the centre – a gift from a senior who left for her native place after her post graduation.
Most memorable day :-
The dept of ENT at my college decided to go on a one day trip to a resort last month. I would say that it was a once in a lifetime experience what with my professors dancing their heart out rapaciously to Bollywood and A.R.Rahman music! I wouldn’t lie, but i had my share of the bliss of a hammock for the first time ever in my life. We had such amazing time in the pool and then at the beach that the decision is on for another trip of the like in three months time!
Books that i read :-
Serious men by Manu Joseph and A bad character by Deepti Kapoor. Owing to busy schedules i had started selecting books to read based on their reviews and thankfully i didnt go wrong in my decision for those two books were stupendous works of fiction!
Favourite movie experience of the month :-
The Ring. Having watched it for the umpteenth time, relaxed and slumped down on my couch, i felt satiated, which rarely happened these days while rushing through carelessly selected movies in between hectic duties.
So i suppose i could go on and on inspecting minute details of my past leaving it bare here effortlessly. I am winding this account up lest i would start reeling myself over the top, lulling you with details about anything that caught my attention the past one month. Let me save those for another post. So, how was your October ? :)